Runtime
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Thank you for agreeing to this interview.
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Ten Thumbs
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Runtime
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Er… yes… Here at Runtime we estimate that you’ve been installed on 1.5 million computers worldwide, how does it feel to be teaching so many people to type?
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Hey dude, the attention rocks man. Like, totally. I used to be this small town hiking viking, doing sword stuff in uncool places. Now I’m the main man in the typing scene! I coulda been involved in that Capital One card disaster... gee I'm glad I avoided that.
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Ten Thumbs
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Runtime
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You must generate quite a lot of sentences…
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You bet dude! I know nona gazillions of sentences, yeah! You wanna hear some? I know German! waaaaay cool! Mit dem Ten Thumbs Typing Tutor lernen Sie das Maschinenschreiben ganz einfach – und es macht Spaß!
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Ten Thumbs
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Runtime
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Er yes, thank you How many languages do you speak now?
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I’ve been real hammering on the languages man, I’m learning faster’n you can eat hotdogs! Hotdogs are cool man, you know what I mean? I like ketchup and mustard and onions way stacked… oh, languages? I dunno how many, I type man, I don’t count.
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Ten Thumbs
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Runtime
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I heard you speak four, is that right? English, Spanish, French and German? And, with Dutch and Danish just around the corner, you’re still learning more?
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Suu-ure, four is nothin’. I’m gonna speak a gazillion languages soon! Those dudes all over is longing to meet me, gotta get the language!
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Ten Thumbs
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Runtime
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Does it take you long to teach each person how to type?
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Well dude, some folks is whizzing away, clackety clack, giving me a headache keeping up with them, one hour, boom, all the keys. Yeah. And some dudes is way slow. They tap and look and tap and look, and get all tense cos they thinks they ain’t going fast enough, but that’s cool, you know? I just gentle them along like, with nice words and encouragement, cos it ain’t no good yelling at folks is it?
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Ten Thumbs
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Runtime
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Do you find that er sometimes people don’t practice often enough?
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Now listen dude. If there’s one think that gets my helmet steaming, its a guy who can’t find 15 lousy minutes a day to take me out and work with me. I mean, dude, do you know what its like inside a hardrive?? It’s dark man, and *&^$ cramped, and all those icons jostling up together... If you can’t find 15 lousy minutes, just 15 minutes, well man, you ain’t serious, that’s all I can say, you cannot be serious. Lemme tell you another thing…"
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Ten Thumbs
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Runtime
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Yes, quite, I quite understand… But they can practice less often, right?
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Suuuure, you CAN practise less often. Oh yes. If you want to make my horns glow and feel this here spear poking right at you, like HERE man, you CAN PRACTICE LESS OFTEN!
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Ten Thumbs
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Runtime
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Would you like a nice gingerbread latte? Very calming, tea… Let's, let's talk about something else. People can try you at home for 10 days before having to pay for your services. Do you think that Runtime is undervaluing your services by letting people have so much free time with you?
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Yo dude. This whole charging thing. It gives me the heebies. You just pay me my salary, so I can get enough helmets and hotdogs, and I’ll do the work. I don’t need to know nuthin’ about charging. Except the axes kind. You wanna see me charge with an axe?
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Ten Thumbs
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Runtime
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No, thanks, that’s ok. Not right now. If that’s ok with you. And then we give away free upgrades to your students, that doesn’t bother you either?
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Listen dude. I just said. You want me to clean your ears? I don’t need to know nuthin about charging, that’s your business. That’s what I keep you around for, to deal with all that business stuff.
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Ten Thumbs
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Runtime
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Er, right, right. So, I’m sure you’d like me to explain to everyone listening out there, if a minor improvement comes out you’d like everyone to be able to use it. So if a, er, dude, buys version 3, he’ll get all the upgrades that come as version 3.x, though you’d still have to pay a modest sum for version 4. Right? Can you tell us a little about the future?
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Listen good man, cos the future is real exciting! Version 4 is where it’s at! Solid. Packed. I’m getting better all the time, never felt so good. I’m gonna be showing 5 new habits, I’m working out and getting even more flexible - see my muscles dude!- and I’ve been on courses to learn how to help y’all even better.
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Ten Thumbs
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Runtime
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Thanks for taking the time to talk to us. We’re all very excited about version 4, and as it’s Ten Thumbs’ birthday we’re throwing in an extra bonus: buy version 3 now and we’ll give you a free upgrade to version 4 when we’re all happy with it, and Ten Thumbs has finished learning his new lesson plans.
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Is there a party? Cos man, I like beer with my hot dogs, you know what I’m saying?
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Ten Thumbs
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